Philosophy – Page 2

May 2, 2023May 2, 2023

Being Right vs. Being Happy: Which do you choose?

Sometimes we get so caught up in being right that we forget about the feelings and well-being of others. That’s when we lose track of what really matters. The people we love, the things we enjoy, and the fact that life is short. What’s the point of being right if you end up unhappy and lonely because of it? Maybe we’re all right in our own way, maybe no one is always right, and maybe it doesn’t really matter who’s right or wrong.

Focus on the important things like enjoying the precious time we have in life with those we love and care about. Set aside your differences and accept each other without condition. Make the most of what you have and help those around you to do the same. In the end, who was right or wrong won’t matter as much as the time you spent with others and the quality of that time.

Understand that we all have different opinions and experiences in life, and get past those things so you can enjoy your time with loved ones and friends. Put love and friendship above opinion and other things in life. It is the time we spend with others that makes our lives meaningful in the end. The older you get, the fewer friends and family you have left in your life, so you realize that they are the most precious things to you.

Also as you age, you look back and regret the time you missed with loved ones and the mistakes you made in those relationships. You also see how foolish some arguments were or how unimportant the whole argument was. Regret always comes with age, but learning from mistakes is how we grow and improve as a person. So don’t hold on to the regret, forgive yourself and move on with that lesson in mind so you don’t repeat the mistakes of your past.

In conclusion, being right is not as important as being kind, compassionate, and respectful to others. We should not let our opinions and differences get in the way of our relationships and happiness. We should cherish the time we have with our loved ones and friends, and make the most of every moment. We should also learn from our mistakes and forgive ourselves and others. Life is too short to waste on arguments and regrets. We should live with love and gratitude in our hearts, and enjoy the gift of life that we have been given.

Ray Barbier

April 26, 2023

To the young, I say take the risks when you can, they may pay off in the future.

Somedays I just sit here and reminisce about my younger years, the passion I once had, the dreams I had, and how time has eroded most of that away. I look back and see how many opportunities I let slip by me and the results of missing those opportunities affect my current life. Too many what-ifs plague my mind at times and that takes away from my ability to make better choices in the present moment. Though I am aging and am slowed down physically due to some poor choices I have made, I still try to continue on this path before me.

To the young, I say take the risks when you can, they may pay off in the future. Live in the moment but remember to prepare for the future ahead of you. Shrug off any fear you may have, it only holds you back and keeps you from moving forward and possibly keeps you from the gifts laying before you. It is far better to try and fail than to regret never trying later on in life, and most of all plan for retirement from the very start.

Life is not as long as you think it is when you are young, it will pass you by in a flash and you will find yourself wishing you had done far more while you were young and able. Also, the older you get the less people seem to respect you or care about your well-being it seems. Unfortunately, this world is too indifferent toward the needs and wants of the older population. Too many see older people as disposable and rather turn a blind eye to them and their issues than care for and celebrate them and their life and contributions to the world we now live in.

Do not let life pass you by and leave you on the roadside like litter, plan and be prepared for the so-called golden years ahead of you. They will sneak up on you way faster than you could possibly imagine. Have compassion for those who were blessed enough to make it to the later years of life and respect them as well. The older generation happens to be the people who helped build the world you live in today.

Ray Barbier

April 25, 2023April 25, 2023

We should not just ignore and be blind. We should care and be kind.

It amazes me how we humans can turn a blind eye to the troubles of this world and act as if they do not exist. Maybe it is because we feel helpless to change them, or maybe it is because we are too cozy in our own little worlds. But I believe this way of living is detrimental, not only to ourselves but also to the world we inhabit.

We should not be ignorant of the pain of others, the unfairness of society, the damage to nature, and the dangers to our future. We should not act as if everything is okay when it is clearly not. We should not just wish that someone else will solve things for us. We should take accountability for our deeds and their outcomes. We should be mindful, empathetic, and active.

I understand it is difficult to face reality sometimes. I understand it can be daunting and frightening. I understand it can make us feel sorrowful, furious, or hopeless. But I also understand that ignoring reality will not make it disappear. It will only make it worse. And I understand that we have the ability to make a difference if we decide to.

We have the ability to assist others in distress, fight for what is right, preserve and heal our environment, and determine our fate. We have the ability to create a better world for ourselves and for future generations. We have the ability to live a significant and satisfying life.

But we have to use that ability wisely and responsibly. We have to open our eyes and see what is happening around us. We have to open our hearts and feel what others are feeling. We have to open our minds and think of solutions. And we have to open our hands and take action.

We should not just ignore and be blind. We should care and be kind.

Ray Barbier

April 24, 2023

In ancient times the elders of the tribe were celebrated

In ancient times the elders of the tribe were celebrated and looked upon as wise counselors and leaders. They Told stories of old times, advised the young when called upon, and kept the tribe safe. The Tribe would make sure the elders always had adequate food and shelter and loved them as they should.

Unfortunately, in modern times elders are looked upon as burdens, relics of the past, and disposable. Elder generations starve themselves in order to pay for medications needed to keep themselves alive and to pay rent so that they can have a place to rest their head. Grown children place their parents in rest homes that gladly take the money from social security and barely take care of the elderly in their care.

A Government that sees the elderly as a financial burden on the system and seeks a way to eventually sunset social security and Medicare in the name of fiscal responsibility. I find it so funny how it is bad to spend money to help the elderly and poor but so acceptable if not celebrated to spend money on things that benefit the wealthy and big business.

Considering that a senator can serve one term and get a retirement that is quite above what one would get from social security working their whole life, I guess I can see how they care very little about social security since their own retirement is so secure. Really sad how modern society and the government view and treat our elderly. Everyone deserves to be respected, and everyone deserves an income that is livable.

We need to learn from our history and remember the importance of our elders and all others in the tribe of humanity. People need to vote out those who do not do their job in representing all people in the state they represent and vote for better candidates. Families need to revere the elders and when they have no choice but to put the elderly in rest homes, they need to make sure the rest home is doing the job they are supposed to do.

So much is broken in our modern world, and so much is overlooked and allowed to go on without any oversight or consequences. Too much is lost in the rhetoric of politics and the war for the best ratings in news agencies. So much is lost in the name of popularism and profit, and so many people are forgotten as well.

Do not let your parents, grandparents, and elders in your community be left behind and treated like they are disposable. One day it may be you who are the elder person being cast aside and forgotten. So what you do today to protect the elderly will one day protect you as you age.

Ray Barbier

#elderly #congress

April 16, 2023

Dovestar’s Ramblings 4-16-2023

I don’t know, it may just be me but this recent trend in the USA of book banning seems to be censorship, it also seems to be motivated by some people’s prejudices and hatred of certain groups in society. The one that really gets me is the banning of books with the words butt and fart in them. That sounds so much like a South Park episode in which parents tried to ban a cartoon that featured the exact same thing. I guess it is all about one’s point of view there.

It is truly sad that in the land of the free that a few can decide what the many can see, read or do. Censorship is a dangerous thing, first people may censor things that may not be as important to you but then in time they censor more and more till there is only one view available in literature, and news, and allowed in public. It’s a dangerous slope to be walking along here people. Once you start down that road it sets you up for total censorship.

It seems like the right to pursue one’s happiness is only a right if it agrees with the beliefs and values of the most vocal group. You are only allowed to be happy if it is what others dictate as acceptable. I wonder if that is how the founding fathers saw it? I wonder if they wanted only a small group to be happy and the rest of the country to just fall in line and suffer or be denied their happiness.

I doubt they wanted it to be the pursuit of happiness if it is dictated by a single group or person. Does not matter if you like or believe in the way another individual seeks out happiness, that is their choice and life. I do however believe it is your right to speak your mind on the issue but not in a hateful or hurtful manner. If someone else dislikes your choice of how to seek happiness, you too must respect their opinion and not be angry or hateful in return.

Then we come around to the issue at hand, the fear of parents about their children being influenced by others. This has always been an issue, not just now and not just with the current issues being fought over. In the past, it was such things as religion in schools, desegregation, sex education, and so on. First off if you teach your children well at home about the things you fear, then those children should be well-armed to deal with the influences found in school and from peers.

Schools have been saddled with too much responsibility in trying to teach children social values. It is a hard balancing act and making sure the classrooms are inclusive and safe for all children regardless of their differences is not an easy task. Trying to teach children tolerance and respect for all people, regardless of their religion, color, sexual preference, and so on, should not be on the teacher’s shoulders but it should be the responsibility of the parents. The sad part is it seems there is a failure in that regard both in school and at home for some kids.

Jesus forgave and accepted all sinners, he taught forgiveness not judgmentalism. God is the judge, so we should leave the judging to him, we should instead love and forgive as we were taught by Jesus. To accept a sinner and love him/her is not accepting their sins. We all sin, and no sin is greater or lesser than another, and all is forgivable except one and that is blasphemy of the holy ghost/spirit. So why do we hate certain groups because of a certain sin, if we are to hate sinners then we must hate everyone including ourselves.

If you hate others, then you deny yourself the chance to know them, to understand them, and even the chance to be friends with them. Just because they live in a way you dislike or don’t understand doesn’t mean that they are not a good person. They are just different from you in that particular way. Look beyond your differences, put aside the things you see as unacceptable in each other, and look at the person in front of you and see them as who they really are.

I guess it boils down to this, you shouldn’t try to impose the values and morals of the religion you chose to follow on others. You should only apply those values and beliefs to yourself. It was your choice to believe in and follow the religion you chose and thus you must apply those values to yourself. Other people have chosen other paths in life and they are responsible for their own choices and actions. This does not mean you can not preach or try to counsel or advise. Just means you should accept it if they choose to do differently.

Love all people, regardless of their differences and shortcomings. Be a messenger of love and compassion not the harbinger of hate. and do your best to be a teacher or a preacher and not a persecutor. In the end, the choice is all yours, you can walk your path in the manner you chose and treat others the way you see fit. Just remember you are accountable for how you treat others in life and that you will reap the fruit of the seeds you have sewn in your life.

I wish everyone a happy life and love-filled days along this path of life.

Ray Barbier

April 8, 2023

Dealing with Toxic People: Strategies for Protecting Your Mental Health

Toxic people are unfortunately a fact of life. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or coworker, we’ve all come across someone who seems to constantly bring negativity and drama into our lives. Dealing with toxic people can be difficult and draining, but there are strategies you can use to protect yourself and maintain your mental health.

Firstly, it’s important to identify toxic behaviors. Toxic people tend to be negative, and critical, and always seem to be in conflict with others. They may gossip or spread rumors, undermine your confidence, or try to control your actions. They may also be manipulative, playing on your emotions to get what they want.

Once you’ve identified toxic behaviors, it’s important to set boundaries. This can be difficult, especially if the toxic person is a friend or family member, but it’s essential for your well-being. You can start by limiting your interactions with them and avoiding conversations that involve negativity or drama. If you have to interact with them, keep your conversations light and focused on positive topics.

It’s also important to remember that toxic people often thrive on conflict and drama, so don’t engage with them when they try to bait you into an argument. Instead, take a step back and remind yourself that their behavior is not a reflection of you. Focus on your own goals and priorities, and don’t let their negativity derail your progress.

Another important strategy is to surround yourself with positive influences. Seek out friends and family members who support you and lift you up, and try to spend more time with them. You can also seek out new social circles or hobbies that bring you joy and fulfillment. By focusing on positive influences, you’ll have a better perspective on life and be better equipped to deal with toxic people when they arise.

Finally, it’s important to practice self-care. Dealing with toxic people can be draining, so it’s important to take care of yourself both physically and mentally. Make sure to get enough sleep, eat a healthy diet, and exercise regularly. You can also practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques, such as meditation or yoga, to help you stay centered and focused.

In conclusion, dealing with toxic people is never easy, but it’s important to remember that you have the power to protect yourself and maintain your mental health. By identifying toxic behaviors, setting boundaries, surrounding yourself with positive influences, and practicing self-care, you can stay resilient and focused on your own goals and priorities.

Here are a few websites that may help you with toxic people and mental health issues

Psychology Today – A website that offers articles and resources on psychology and mental health, including tips for dealing with toxic people.
Tiny Buddha – A personal development website that provides articles and resources on mindfulness, happiness, and personal growth. They have a section specifically on toxic people and how to deal with them.
The Gottman Institute – A website dedicated to improving relationships through research-based principles. They have an article on how to deal with toxic people, specifically in the context of romantic relationships.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) – A mental health organization that provides resources and support for individuals and families affected by mental illness. They have a section on their website dedicated to dealing with difficult people.
Mindful – A website that offers resources and information on mindfulness and meditation. They have an article on how to protect yourself from toxic people by cultivating mindfulness.

February 4, 2023February 4, 2023

The battle between the self-centered and benevolent sides of our ego

Oh, how easy it is to get lost in your own mind, caught in worries, and in your own insecurities. To be locked in a never-ending cycle of what if, why me, and life isn’t fair. We tend to be stuck in a tunnel view of life at times. It is so easy to fall into the trap of seeing things as always about ourselves or that the world is against us. I think everyone deals with such thoughts and feelings from time to time, and that is okay I think. But being constantly stuck in that train of thought is unhealthy and it keeps us from moving forward and from enjoying life.

Life is about everyone and everything around us, we are not the center of the universe though it is easy to feel like the center of things. I believe it is human nature to be somewhat self-centered, It is part of the self-preservation mechanism within us all. I do not think it is even possible to be totally selfless, though I do think we can reach a pretty high percentage of being such. But then again there are known mental illnesses such as the martyr syndrome and so on that may make one appear more so selfless and other mental illnesses that can cause the opposite effect.

I think people should regularly check themselves, see how they treat others, and how they react to being treated by others as well. Since how one person acts and treats others influences all those around them in one fashion or another, then we should try to be a force for good in society. We should try to lead by example, and treat others, and ourselves in a kind and compassionate manner. If more people focused on how they treated others around them, the less toxic people and environments we all would have to encounter. Being toxic and/or self-entitled is damaging to society and in the long run, will only eat away at the person being toxic and/or self-entitled.

A percentage of toxic and self-entitled people may be suffering some sort of emotional or mental illness, and we should remember that. It is best to avoid those people if you can not get through to them and set boundaries for them when it comes to your relationship. Do not allow the toxic behavior of others to bait you into being toxic yourself, you have to hold the high ground and lead by example. It is so easy to fall prey to being baited into a word battle with toxic people. They seem to enjoy causing turmoil and thrive in the toxic atmosphere.

It is not easy to try and be a good-hearted individual, to think of others as much if not more than yourself. But then anything worthwhile takes a lot of effort, and it does not only help you emotionally and mentally, but it also helps those around you. To love, have compassion for others, and be charitable are very important and are quite therapeutic in the end. When we help others we are also helping ourselves, it causes our body to produce chemicals that make us feel happy or content. The human body and brain are geared towards pleasure as a reward, reason why humans are so prone to addiction, But that’s a topic for another post.

In the end, it boils down to the battle between the self-centered and benevolent sides of our ego. When they are in balance all is good, when it tips one way or another there are complications. Either we will put ourselves before and above all others causing harm to others eventually or we will put others above ourselves to such an extent that we will neglect our own well-being. It is all about balance, and what balance is right for you as an individual.

Just some thoughts for you, not bad for me before my first cup of coffee lol.

Blessings and happiness to all

Ray Barbier

January 24, 2023

Dove’s Thoughts 1-24-23

Buddha said, “Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule”. Love is the energy behind what we call forgiveness, and is one of the most important keys to ridding ourselves of hatred and anger. The Qur’an has the verse “The repayment of a bad action is one equivalent to it. But if someone pardons and puts things right, his reward is with Allah… (Qur’an, 42:40)”. Forgiveness is found in almost every great religious text. In the new testament of the Christian bible “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (Colossians 3:13, NIV)“

It seems that forgiveness is something important in religion, but it is also important to philosophers, poets, and great thinkers throughout history. The following are just some of what has been said/written about the subject of forgiveness.

Confucius ~ “Those who cannot forgive others break the bridge over which they themselves must pass.”
Voltaire ~ “We are all full of weakness and errors; let us mutually pardon each other our follies – it is the first law of nature.”
Paramhansa Yogananda ~ “Today I forgive all those who have ever offended me. I give my love to all thirsty hearts, both to those who love me and to those who do not love me.”
Epictetus ~“When you are offended at any man’s fault, turn to yourself and study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger.”
Friedrich Nietzsche ~ “And if your friend does evil to you, say to him, ”I forgive you for what you did to me, but how can I forgive you for what you did to yourself?”
Horace ~ “It is right for him who asks forgiveness for his offenses to grant it to others.”

So forgiveness is something important, it is the key to freeing yourself and others from past mistakes and all the pain and suffering those mistakes have caused. It is just as important to the forgiven as it is to the forgiver. Forgiveness may not always be easy, but in the end, it is well worth the effort. Holding on to a grudge, all the pain and suffering attached to it does no good for either side in the long run.

December 12, 2022

Dove’s Thoughts 12-12-2022

Why all the stigma around mental health? Why do people have to be so cruel to those that just need a little help? We all need a little help now and then (even if some folks won’t ever admit it). There is no shame in admitting you need help and asking for it is the best thing to do. Life can be quite challenging at times, and our hearts and minds can be somewhat fragile at times as well. Getting help shows courage and demonstrates you have the strength to do what is needed to move forward in your life.

We face so much negativity in life, and a good part of it is during our youth, during the years we are developing our emotional and mental makeup and forming our personality as well. School years can be both the most wonderful and also the most dangerous time for us as individuals. During those years we form social bonds and face opposition from others in the form of bullying and social stereotyping. This is when we tend to gain many emotional and mental scars and problems. If we do not learn to overcome them eventually they just get worse as we age.

With all the suicides and gun violence and other forms of violence on the rise, it should be very apparent there is a need for more extensive mental health programs for all ages. Parents and teachers alike should be more observant and responsive to signs of depression, being bullied, and psychotic behavior. If we can catch a lot of the problems early we may avert the negative outcome that many may have to experience later in their lives. More has to be done both on the local and federal levels to make mental health services easier and more affordable to access so we can get a handle on this mental health problem our nation is facing.

Just remember the next time you see someone who needs help don’t just laugh at them or ignore them, instead try to help them find the help they need.

Ray Barbier

November 9, 2022

Dovestar’s Ramblings 11-9-2022

There are many things in life we have little to no ability to change or affect. There are things though, that we have complete control over in our lives and that is where we should focus our energy on. For example, you may have no control over how others perceive you or how they think about you in general, but you do have control over how you treat other people and how you view yourself. One would hope that how we act and treat others, and the words we chose to have some influence on the opinions of others but in the end, it is something that is out of our control.

Basically, your life is yours to lead, and how you live it has a great influence on how much happiness you have in life. You can live your life selfishly, find some quick self-gratification and temporary bliss from possessions and wealth or you can choose to live a more selfless and humble life. Not everyone is cut out to be like a monk and live without any sort of possessions and be totally selfless, but we can find a balance between serving the ego and serving others.

I believe that we all have been given life not only to live and experience all it has to give but also to be stewards of the earth and to teach, help and love one another. Each one of us has a part to play in this grand design of life and each part is unique to each person. Some of us are here to teach, some are here to heal, and so on. Discovery your the part you are to play is not always easy but usually the gifts you were given usually give you clues as to what you are supposed to be doing in life. One example is if you have a natural talent for playing the piano, you could be here to give people entertainment or teach others how to play the piano or you may write a song that changes the minds of others.

Life can be complicated and so can how your mind works, the mind can be your best asset and it also can be an obstacle. Many people battle with depression, low self-esteem, and poor self-image and that will make it an uphill battle in finding happiness in life. Most of us face the memories of past mistakes and the regrets that come from them and many times we face trauma from past experiences that we have a hard time letting go of as well. And once again we come to things we can not change, things in our past are set and won’t change o matter how much we wish they would. Though we can not change the past, we can change how we deal with those past experiences and memories, how we process them, and how they affect us in the present.

We must let go of our past mistakes and the traumatic experiences we suffered due to circumstances and others. Forgiveness is one step in putting those things behind you, you must forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made and forgive others for what they had done as well. Forgiving others serves to free you from the hurt and pain others brought on you more than to free them of guilt. Think about it, how many times have you done something wrong and had been forgiven but yet hold on to the regret? That’s because you haven’t forgiven yourself, so you haven’t released yourself from the grief associated with your mistakes. So forgiving someone is more beneficial to you than it is for the person you are forgiving in the long run.

You can also look at it this way, if the person feels no regret over what they did to you in the first place, then how is the person you are forgiving gaining from your forgiveness? It is about letting go of the hurt, pain, and anger you hold towards the person that has done you wrong in the end. Also Just because you forgave someone does not mean you will forget what they did, and thus the trust they lost will stay the same.

Unloading that baggage of past hurt and regret frees up your mind to focus on more important things, such as being happy and enjoying life with those you love. So that leaves us dealing with poor self-image and self-esteem issues, which is a harder issue since we all have different reasons for being down on ourselves. Could be a combination of us accepting negative opinions of family and/or peers, our own negative opinions of ourselves, and past failures.

You can try to trace things back to their origin, try and figure out why you accepted it as truth, and then accept that it was only opinion, not fact. To be honest there are many self-help books out there dealing with this and if they are not helpful I would suggest getting help from a professional if it is a severe case.

Do your best to change what is within your power and learn to accept the things you can not control or change my friend. Peace and Blessings to all!