Other People’s Opinions, your self-image and self-esteem

Throughout life, you have to face things such as peer pressure, social pressures, and judgment by your peers. It starts as early as your childhood, first in your home then even more in your school years. It never ends, you have to deal with the opinions of others around you and you have to deal with their impression of who you are. This puts a lot of stress on you and your self-image and self-esteem.

Some people seem to naturally or instinctively deal with such things with little effort or negative effects on their emotional and mental well-being, others take it all to heart and internalize all of the opinions and judgments aimed at them and wind up with poor self-esteem and poor self-image. I wonder what is the difference between both of those types of people, is it that some do not care what others think, or do they just have a better sense of self so what is thrown at them bothers them less?

Either way, if you are the type of person who takes other people’s opinions of you to heart and allows them to decimate your self-worth and self-esteem, you need to learn techniques in dealing with such. Finding the right tools to help you cope with such things and find ways to improve your self-image and so on.

How to Deal with Other People’s Opinions of You

One of the biggest challenges we face in life is how to deal with other people’s opinions of us. Whether it’s our family, friends, coworkers, or strangers, we often encounter criticism, judgment, or rejection from others who don’t understand us or share our values. Sometimes, these opinions can hurt us deeply and make us doubt ourselves and our worth.

But the truth is, other people’s opinions of us are not facts. They are just perspectives, based on their own experiences, beliefs, and biases. They don’t define who we are or what we can do. They don’t have the power to change our reality unless we let them.

So how can we deal with other people’s opinions of us without letting them affect our happiness and self-esteem? Here are some tips:

  • Remember that you are not responsible for other people’s opinions. You can’t control what they think or say about you, but you can control how you react to them. Don’t take their opinions personally or let them influence your decisions. You are the only one who knows yourself best and what is right for you.
  • Focus on your own opinions of yourself. The most important opinion you have is the one you have of yourself. Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Recognize your strengths and achievements. Celebrate your uniqueness and authenticity. Don’t compare yourself to others or seek their approval. You are enough as you are.
  • Surround yourself with positive and supportive people. Choose to spend time with people who respect you, appreciate you, and encourage you. People who inspire you, challenge you, and help you grow. People who love you for who you are and not for who they want you to be. These are the people who matter the most and whose opinions you should value.
  • Learn from constructive feedback but ignore destructive criticism. Not all opinions are equal. Some opinions can be helpful and beneficial, while others can be harmful and detrimental. Learn to distinguish between constructive feedback and destructive criticism. Constructive feedback is honest, respectful, and specific. It aims to help you improve and grow. Destructive criticism is rude, vague, and general. It aims to hurt you and tear you down. Learn from the former but ignore the latter.
  • Express yourself confidently and respectfully. Don’t be afraid to share your opinions, thoughts, and feelings with others. Don’t let other people’s opinions silence you or make you feel ashamed. You have the right to express yourself and be heard. But also be respectful of other people’s opinions, even if they differ from yours. You don’t have to agree with them or change them, but you can acknowledge them and try to understand them.

Remember that other people’s opinions of you are not your problem. They are their problem. You don’t have to let them affect your happiness and self-esteem. You are a unique and valuable person who deserves respect and love from yourself and others.

Improving your self image and self esteem

Self image is how you see yourself, and self esteem is how you feel about yourself. Both are important for your well-being and happiness. However, many people struggle with low self image and self esteem due to various factors, such as negative feedback, unrealistic expectations, social comparison, or past experiences.

If you are one of them, don’t worry. You are not alone, and you can improve your self image and self esteem with some simple steps. Here are some tips to help you:

  • Recognize your strengths and achievements. You have many qualities and skills that make you unique and valuable. Make a list of them and remind yourself of them often. Celebrate your successes and learn from your failures. Don’t let others define you or put you down.
  • Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend. Speak to yourself positively and respectfully. Avoid harsh criticism and self-judgment. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and accept yourself as you are. You are worthy of love and respect.
  • Challenge your negative thoughts and beliefs. Sometimes we have distorted or irrational thoughts that affect our self image and self esteem. For example, we may think that we are not good enough, that we have to be perfect, or that we can’t change. These thoughts are not true and they only limit us. Try to identify them and replace them with more realistic and positive ones. For example, instead of thinking “I can’t do anything right”, think “I can do many things well and I can improve on others”.
  • Take care of your physical and mental health. Your body and mind are connected, and they influence each other. When you take care of your physical health, you feel better mentally, and vice versa. Eat well, exercise regularly, get enough sleep, and avoid substances that harm you. Also, practice relaxation techniques, such as meditation, breathing exercises, or yoga, to reduce stress and anxiety.
  • Do things that make you happy and fulfilled. Find hobbies and activities that you enjoy and that bring you joy. Express yourself creatively through art, music, writing, or any other form. Learn new things and challenge yourself. Volunteer for a cause that you care about or help someone in need. These things will boost your confidence and self-esteem, as well as make your life more meaningful.

Improving your self image and self esteem is not easy, but it is possible. It takes time, patience, and practice. But it is worth it, because you deserve to feel good about yourself and to live a happy life.

Remember: You are amazing just the way you are! 😊

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Self Esteem and Self Image

fashionable young ethnic female millennial standing on street and looking at camera
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People wonder why there is so much low self-esteem in the world, if you take a good look at television shows, commercials, social media, movies, and even the news on cable news stations you just may see some of the reasons for low self-esteem, but then there is also how one’s family treats them, their peers and the educational system.

When you are constantly bombarded with images of thin, fit, and muscular actors, advertisements aimed to push miracle vitamins and supplements to fix all your shortcomings, it is very hard to hold on to a good self-image and even harder to build it up. Constantly being told that having a perfect body weight, toned muscles, the right clothes, and accessories makes one beautiful and successful is making it hard for most people to maintain healthy self-esteem.

Photo by Karol D on Pexels.com

Unfortunately, fashion, the newest electronics, and possessions play a big part in teenage self-image, which makes it hard for those who don’t have the money to compete with their peers. Combining that with parents that have to work 2 jobs or inconvenient hours to maintain the quality of life they have only makes it harder on teenagers and kids.

The ones that seem to suffer the worst during school years are those that don’t quite fit the norm, the overweight, the below-average to average looking, and the sensitive passive individuals. Bullying from those who think they are cool, tougher, and better than others does not help the situation at all. The consequences of bullying are usually mild and it seems it’s hard to catch kids bullying or maybe some just overlook it.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Parents and siblings also play a large part in the development of a child’s self-esteem, they can be either a positive or negative force when it comes to a child’s self-image. Siblings usually are competing for the parent’s attention, love and favor so they tend to be very mean to one another. Parents on the other hand usually are trying to do what’s best for the child but don’t realize what works for one child does not always work for the other. Each child is a unique individual, they have different needs and need help in different ways. Some parents, unfortunately, don’t know how to deal with their children at all so they try to treat them as if they are adults way before the child or teen is emotionally and mentally ready to do so. This usually results in conflict and the child/teen becomes rebellious and has a poor self-image.

If the low self-esteem is not addressed and corrected during the child/teen years then it is carried into the adult years. That makes it very hard for the Adult to achieve a healthy relationship with a significant other and even harder for them to become successful in the work world.

Raising kids is not an easy task, being a parent means you have to be a caregiver, advisor, instructor, friend, leader, cook, counselor, and of course an ATM for the children lol. Helping a child navigate the battlefields of youth and preparing them for the many challenges they will have to face in the future is not an easy thing to accomplish. All you can do is give it your best shot and always be there for them when they need you.

Photo by Matheus Ferrero on Pexels.com

I myself have had self-esteem issues throughout my life, I have been battling low self-esteem for many decades. I could go down a list of all the things that caused my low self-esteem but what is the use of that now that it now falls squarely on me to repair the damage and improve myself. Plus the first step in moving on and building up your self-esteem/self-image is to forgive those who helped in destroying it and letting go of your own contributions to the whole mess as well.

Just know this, there is no one better than you, but then there is no one lesser than you. We all are unique, we all have our own gifts to embrace and shortcomings that we need to deal with. There is no one on this planet that does not have some emotional or psychological baggage to deal with. How much money you have, and how many toys you have has nothing to do with who you are or how good you are. What defines you is how you live life, and how you treat others and yourself.

Being successful sure feels good, being financially well off does make life easier in many ways, but money, possessions, and success are fleeting, they can be gone in an instant. Family and friends to me are far more important along with how I treat others, and how I live my life. Those things will be with me throughout my life.

Well, I wish you happiness, remember it does not matter what others think or say about you, it is what you know about yourself that matters the most.

Ray Barbier

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